I'd rather be having a beer!: June 2006

Friday, June 23, 2006

Our New Yacht

Okay, it's not really a yacht, but it's totally hot!! I spent a couple of hours vacuuming and cleaning the inside, and it looks awesome. I also slathered enough Armor All on all the canvas parts to make them completely water proof. Heh . . . I may have gone slightly overboard, but every thing is really clean and shiney! I can't wait for this weekend!! Booze Cruise, baby!!! Erm, I mean, I can't wait to be a sober, responsible boater and drive slowly around the lake in our wonderful new boat. Love you, Mom and Grandma!

I didn't take any pictures of our exact boat, but I found one exactly like it. Well, except for one small difference, which I'll point out. So. Here's the boat - it's a 1996 Bayliner Bowrider 40th Anniversary Edition:

Here's the back of the boat if your standing in the stern and looking back:

The only difference is that our boat doesn't have the engine cover thingy - there are three seat cushions in the back, so you can cram at least 4 people back there! - which, of course, we'd never do . . .

This is Shorty's captain's chair:

This is the front of the boat if you're standing by the chairs:

There's a navy blue canvas cover that unstaps so you can cram a couple more people up front in the stern.

This is the back of the boat if you're standing all the way up front:

This is the front of the boat, if you're standing all the way in the back:

Here's another shot of Shorty's captain's chair - and the quad seats each fold flat and are perfect for suntanning - how conveeeeenient:

This is the view from my chair:

The interior is totally cute! It's white and navy blue with cream accents - all colors designed to show off a nice tan. Our friend who sold us the boat left us his water skiis, wake board, boogie board, a wet suit, an inflatable round thingy, (it's like an innertube, only it doesn't have a hole in the middle) and a ton of rope for towing victims, I mean, water skiiers and inner tubers! I absolutely can't wait to go out and play on the lake this weekend!

Screw softball, I'm bailing on all the rest of the tourneys. If you wanna find me, I'll be rippin' around the lake in the new hotness!

*** I'm not sure if I'm supposed to give this guy props, but the boat shown in these pictures is actually for sale on Ebay. Just search '1996 Bayliner' and it should pop up! ***

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Shiver me timbers!!

Shorty bought a boat this afternoon!!! We got a screamin' deal on a 16 foot 1996 Bayliner 40th Anniversary Edition lake boat. One of our softball buddies was selling it and Shorty checked it out yesterday and forked over the casheesh a couple of hours ago - and just in time for the Affordable summer party this weekend!! SA-WEET!

It's a four seater, which means that Whit, Rhonda and I can lounge while Shorty chauffers us around the lake. It's just another part of Plan: Make Whit Move Back To Squarebanks . . . .

I've been digging around on the Internet for information on our new pretty, and I think it looks something like this:

I'm a complete ass and didn't make it to Affordable during lunch to check it out, so I can't confirm the hotness of the new toy as yet. However, this does provide me with the perfect excuse to trade in my hot piece of truck for something a little bigger, as my truck has a roll pan which equals no hitch, so we have no way to tow the bo-at. You can tow boats with Mustangs, right?

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

That's it, nothing but water, Ex-Lax and Xyience!

I love Jessica Biel. I want her body, and I don't mean that in a female prison movie sort of way. I want to look like that. I want arms like a guy. I want abs you could scrub the laundry on.

I have a home gym and I've never popped out kids - there's absolutely no reason that I shouldn't look like that. So, it's on. Project Make Me As Hot As Jessica Biel starts now!!!

Well, okay, it starts after my softball games tonite because I'm going to have a couple of Bud Lights, but after tomorrow, it's on!!!

Well, actually, we have the lake party this weekend so I'll be drinking and shoveling down hot dogs and cheeseburgers, but after this weekend it's so on!!!

Monday, June 19, 2006

Our Newspaper is Duh duh-duh!

That's 'retarded' for those of you who don't follow Carlos Mencia religiously.

The News Miner blows goats. How in the hell do you get Geri Brown from Lindsey Brown? Idiots . . . . their math is retarded, too, because I know I batted higher than a 500. And yes, Shorty, I am aware that errors don't count as runs . . . jackass . . . .

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Diamonds - that'll shut 'er up!!!

Yes, I'm comparing my blog posts with diamonds. Not just because they're big, sparkly and incite envy amongst my friends, but because if I finally do a post, Whit will shut up and get off me. This post is for you, Fatty!

Aaaaaaand, since I have nothing more interesting than a softball tourney (we took 3rd, which sucked, but I got game MVP and I made the tournament Allstar team), friends coming in from out-of state (Mikey was here for a week and a half of crazy, drunken insanity, and the parts I remember were super fun!!!), allergies laying my butt out (I've never been allergic to anything in my LIFE, but apparently I've developed seasonal allergies, which kicked my butt for 3 1/2 weeks before I finally gave in and went to the doctor for some crack), two of my good friends getting married (CONGRATULATIONS, WARREN & SHEILAH!!!), and my birthday (I'm officially older than dirt) to write about, I hereby dedicate this post to Whit.

This is Whit and I with two of our roommates, being rowdy, as usual - yes, before you ask, there were margaritas involved - for most of us (Whit's the blonde second from the left in MY North Carolina Tar Heels sweatshirt and I'm the fuzzy half nekkid blonde at the end on the right) :

This is Whit (still in my sweatshirt) and me (in my most favoritest Tennesee Vols sweatshirt) busting down a Pink Panther sammich while our other roommate (who shall remain nameless for her own protection) looks shocked and appalled:

This is us at one of the million parties, erm, I mean Study Groups, that we hit (Whit is on the left, our other roommate and best friend is on the right and I'm in the back with the blue tongue - don't ask) :

This is us getting ready to hit up a UAF hockey game (I'm the line backer on the left, Whit's the meat in the sammich and our other best friend is the hottie on the right) :

This is us doing our Blonde Treasure Trolls imitation (Whit's on the left holding her yodeling bear, our best friend is being molested by my stuffed UAF bear and I've got Cookie Monster in a head lock) :

This is Whit and I busting down a cheerleader pose before a soccer game (I'm the cute one on the right) :

This is us getting ready to hit a Beginning of the Semster Beach Kick Off party (Whit's the tall-ass Amazon on the left and I'm the shrimp on the right) :

This is us busting down more pre soccer game cheerleading (If you can't tell us apart by now, I quit) :

And, last but not least, this is Whit and her bridesmaids channeling our inner Charlie's Angels on her wedding day (Whit's the hotty in the expensive white dress and I'm the dork on the left, shooting Lisa in the head) :

I'd rather be having a beer!