UNLEASH THE HOUNDS!!!
Kevin and I have been engaging in potty humor all day, and I've discovered something - the more we talk about dirty, nasty, toilet-related, unlady-like stuff that an innocent little flower such as myself should never even think about, the more I have to poop. And since I'm a kind, considerate co-worker, I'll hold off until I'm in the comfort and privacy of my own bathroom.
In a completely un-related aside, Shorty, don't go into the master bathroom until at least 10:00 p.m. tonight . . . .
FedEX is outtie!
In shocking news that has been burning up the blogosphere since yesterday afternoon, Britney Spears stunned the universe by filing for divorce from the waste of space, Kevin Federline. (Who's name will still wouldn't know if he hadn't latched onto Brit like a leech and proceeded to attempt to bleed her dry.) Looks like baby weight isn't the only thing momma's droppin' of late . . . . You can catch all the details at tmz, dlisted, a socialite's life, popsugar, pink is the new blog (who I borrowed the 'dunzo' picture from) and pretty much every other gossip blog on the planet.But, more pressingly, will Shorty drop me like a stinky bag of poo and rush to Hollywood to console his fantasy chick, or will I be forced to cram bad extentsions in my hair and pound Cheetos in a desperate attempt to keep him interested?(I'm kidding, Brit actually looks fabulous! I love the bob!)
SONOFA - BRRR!!
It is 58 degrees in my office. I shit you not. I can almost see my breath. I have my space heater on, I'm wearing my puffy pale blue down jacket and I'm stuffing myself with egg, cheese, sausage, green onion and green bell pepper yumminess that Shorty made for breakfast yesterday in a desperate, and fruitless, attempt to get some warmth into my body. My fingers feel like little tiny ice cubes and my toes are going numb.
I can't be expected to work in these conditions!!! Just because I choose to live in Alaska doesn't mean that I should have to freeze my nuts off inside as well as outside! My freaking tea won't even stay warm!!! >:(
Victoria's Secret is bringing SEXY back!
PuuurrrrROWR! THAT'S HOT!
Big Kev's cutie pie friend, Missy, gave me the heads up on these bad boys, and all I can say is - I'm bringing moonboots back, bitches!!
I'm all over the pale blue and green pair - like a fat kid on a Smartie!
HOLY SHIT!
YES PLEASE!!!!
This is a public service announcement to rub in the fact that my Chiefs have a better record than:The Steelers (2 - 5)The Redskins (2 - 5)We're tied with the stupid Cowboys, (4 - 3) and we're almost tied with the Eagles (4 - 4).The Pats don't count. :P
